For as long as I could remember ..I have always been talking to myself.

--> But for the theory of rotation..it could have been proved that actually,the sun oscillates from east to west during the day and back again to east while the whole world is busy sleeping.This intellectual freak had gone to such an extent to prove his point that he stayed up an entire night so that he could catch the Sun red-handed trying to fool us.Sadly though it was a sunday night and the test report was signed off stating that 'Sun was on a Weekly off'.

--> Ever wondered how come the hands of those big railway clocks move??
Answer: There is a man/woman(for those who feel strongly about women’s reservation for this job too) sitting inside and moving those hands every five minutes,thus showing us the visual spectacle of a minutes hand actually moving.I believe its a human sitting inside,you can think of any other animal who might be dumb enough to do such a job.

--> I always believed,people sitting on the upper floor of a double-decker bus never ever got down ... for me they were an upgraded version of those sadhus who used to give up everything and go to the himalayas. i believed the newer species was too lazy to travel so far,so they made up for it by travelling in the same city all through their lives.

--> Elephants cant jump off the ground..true..and dogs should give them company in this matter ..I mean,its fine with all the love that they show us,but every single time one of them climbs on me,i am more worried about my manhood being snatched off a few essential ingredients rather than their effervescent excitement.

--> Men !! Stop staring at my girlfriend as if you have found the lost city of ATLANTIS. I know she is beautiful and i'll stare(i mean look at her)enough to make up for ur stares.

--> When you die,do you get an added discount for spending more than half of your lifetime Travelling?? Because incase if you do,then i guess the heavy population influx to mumbai is very well justified.

--> Just because my body has developed the abiltiy to produce sperms which in turn are capable of fertilising a few eggs..does that give me the right to have children??(dedicated to the average indian couple who'd rather have an extra CHILD than use a condom)

--> Its always tough being an idealist ..you never know when you might breakdown ..and when you do which ultimately happens sooner than later you leave behind a herd of aimless people ..people lost in their minds and broken in their hearts ..people identical to a nuclear warhead which finds its way into the arms of those who seldom can be trusted with a matchstick.

--> Why is it that at times I end up staring at something whilst being lost somewhere else and the lady in front of me thinks I am a sex-starved maniac because technically speaking I had been staring at her daughter's breasts for the past five minutes ..I just hope this explains MEN staring at my girlfriend.

--> Its wierd how in today’s world we have enough sunshine in our pockets to build a few palaces in the name of GOD ..to celebrate his birth ..to enjoy his festivals ..but our bank accounts run dry when it comes to helping out the poor and the needy ..its really wierd.

--> Another genius solution was when I thought-over on what(and not who) exactly is responsible to a women’s pregnancy ..I mean everything is fine but how come suddenly after marriage their stomachs start expanding as if they have gulped down a cow .. interesting question,ehh !!!
So at the age of ten,my only logical answer to this seriously intimate question was that girls are supposed to give birth to FOUR children in their lifetime(four because I hadnt met a family with more than four kids till then) and as soon as they get married which by the way happens at a fixed age of 25(nilya's constant) they start yielding those noisy rattlers(i was a heartless knucklehead back then) ..and here’s the icing on cake ..a women’s age is dependent on the number of kids she has.
Now who could have thought of the ladka n ladki meeting up in a secluded spot one rainy night,all soaked up and then lightning striking so hard that it made the ladki pregnant?? ..Actually for the major part of my thinking days i believed the sole purpose of lightning was to help girls get pregnant ..Ofcourse i owe this thought to the bollywood movies.
The porn industry would have definitely sued me,afterall where did SEX fit-in??

[I feel so miserable rite now ..am jumping off from the fourth floor of my two storey building ..But then I realize I have been living in a dream.]

--> The sky menstruates once again,this time announcing the arrival of dusk ..it has been a drudging day ..just need to take my company bus back home ..and as always the street below is piled up with honking tin-cans resembling a snake game right out of my cell phone ..although its the bikes that form the worm,for there’s hardly any place for people to stand ..walking, is a far-fetched dream. Somehow I make my way through the traffic. I find her waiting there ..she always beats me to the queue ..even after ten hours of non-stop slogging she looks as fresh as the morning dew ..as energetic as a toddler on its first outing ..and as happy as she always is. Our bus arrives much to the relief of my aching legs ..she takes in the first seat and I occupy the one next to hers ..Out come the ear-phones and off go those eyes ..rest of my journey is spent trying to decipher her expressions ..those priceless random codes. What would she be thinking of ..Wat would she be listening to ..seems like she enjoys the bus travel,for,there’s an odd giggle, a lip-sync here and there ..and if i am lucky enough i get to witness one of the most beautiful sights GOD could have ever created ..afterall how often does a girl smile at herself nowadays. The radio guy has just started playing Jag jaa from the movie Omkara and ironically it springs up ..no matter how much her face tries to defy the fatigue,it cannot deny that the day has taken a toll on her body and she lets out that cute yawn ..outside,the traffic’s getting thicker by the minute ..I guess its time for her to sleep ..would love to watch her be at peace with herself ..sadly,this is where i get down ..the shows over folks ..Dont feel like leaving but i have to subdue myself on a long lonely walk back home ..I see her asleep ..her head resting on the window bar while the journey continues for me and for her. Still I cannot help but gaze at her ..cannot help but make a fool out of myself because am standing in the middle of the road staring at something not many know exists ..and no matter how hard I try ..I cannot,like the rest of this world ..I cannot help but fall in love......with falling in love!!